A recent TikTok video has sparked outrage among single women who claim that their married friends have become increasingly self-centered in their relationships. Ashanti, a 36-year-old single woman and creator of the popular @unpunishablewoman account, shared her frustrations with an audience of thousands.
According to Ashanti, while she's expected to be supportive and understanding when it comes to her married female friends' life events - such as pregnancies, engagements, or motherhood - they rarely reciprocate. When single women do get together with their married friends who are also mothers, Ashanti claims that the conversation is often dominated by the married friend's own life and interests, leaving the single woman feeling overlooked.
Ashanti pointed out how unfair it feels to be constantly asked about her relationships status, children plans, or other personal matters when the married friend seems more interested in her own achievements. When a single woman tries to share her own accomplishments, like getting a promotion at work or moving into a new home, she's often met with distracted behavior from the married friend.
The TikTok video has resonated deeply with many single women who have shared similar experiences in the comments section. They argue that while they're willing to support their married friends during certain life events, it's not fair for them to be expected to sacrifice their own lives and feelings without any reciprocation.
One commenter summed up the sentiment: "Single and child-free women have to sacrifice for the community, but the community never gives back." Another pointed out how when they shared their vulnerabilities with married friends, it was often met with more entertainment than actual care. A third commented on how her married friend's constant need to talk about their children made them feel like an afterthought.
The video has sparked a heated debate among women who are tired of being taken for granted in their friendships. It highlights the uneven nature of female relationships, where single women often bear the brunt of emotional labor while their married friends reap the benefits of their support without reciprocating.
According to Ashanti, while she's expected to be supportive and understanding when it comes to her married female friends' life events - such as pregnancies, engagements, or motherhood - they rarely reciprocate. When single women do get together with their married friends who are also mothers, Ashanti claims that the conversation is often dominated by the married friend's own life and interests, leaving the single woman feeling overlooked.
Ashanti pointed out how unfair it feels to be constantly asked about her relationships status, children plans, or other personal matters when the married friend seems more interested in her own achievements. When a single woman tries to share her own accomplishments, like getting a promotion at work or moving into a new home, she's often met with distracted behavior from the married friend.
The TikTok video has resonated deeply with many single women who have shared similar experiences in the comments section. They argue that while they're willing to support their married friends during certain life events, it's not fair for them to be expected to sacrifice their own lives and feelings without any reciprocation.
One commenter summed up the sentiment: "Single and child-free women have to sacrifice for the community, but the community never gives back." Another pointed out how when they shared their vulnerabilities with married friends, it was often met with more entertainment than actual care. A third commented on how her married friend's constant need to talk about their children made them feel like an afterthought.
The video has sparked a heated debate among women who are tired of being taken for granted in their friendships. It highlights the uneven nature of female relationships, where single women often bear the brunt of emotional labor while their married friends reap the benefits of their support without reciprocating.
its like i get it they have new babies or whatever but can we pls just talk about ME for once?!? im tired of being asked when im gonna find a hubby or what kind of kids i want when in reality im over here crushing it at work & living my best life and not getting the recognition 
... I've had friends who are married and have kids, and sometimes they just dominate conversations about themselves all the time. Like, I get it, being a mom is hard, but we're not your personal therapists or something! 
It's frustrating when you try to share something cool that happened in your life, like getting a promotion, and they're not even paying attention 
. And yeah, it feels like they expect us single girls to be all supportive and stuffy just because we don't have kids... but we deserve some love back too 
!
I totally get why Ashanti and others are so frustrated. I've had similar experiences with my married friends who just can't seem to balance their own life stuff with being a good friend to me. It's like, I'm happy for you when you're getting engaged or having kids, but don't expect me to be all excited about it 24/7 
. And honestly, it feels kinda draining to always be the one who has to fill the conversation with my own life story while they dominate the topic with their own accomplishments. It's not fair that single women are expected to support and sacrifice for others without getting any reciprocation in return 
.
So I'm watching this TikTok vid and I feel like... 
yaaas to Ashanti! I mean, can we talk about how messed up it is when your friend only wants to talk about themselves all the time? 
It's so unfair that single women are expected to be the emotional support system while married friends get to reap the benefits without giving back.
We need to prioritize our own needs and feelings in our friendships. 
. I've been with my girlfriends since college and we all got married to our partners. But now that they're parents, it feels like they don't have time for us anymore 
. They're always on their phones talking about their kids or their husbands' careers, but when we try to share something exciting happening in our lives, like getting a new job or moving into a new place, they just tune out 
.
. We're more than just wives and mothers, we're our own people too 
.
. It's like I'm invisible unless I'm bringing them food or helping with their kids 
. I wish we could find a better balance in our friendships where everyone gets equal attention and support 
.
. I'm not asking for much, just to be seen and heard as an individual 
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. We deserve to be seen, heard, and supported in return – not just expected to carry the emotional labor without getting anything in return