Behind the Bar, but Not Quite There: One Man's Pub Nightmare
When 25-year-old Simon Hattenstone landed his dream job at The Friendship Inn in Prestwich, he thought he was exactly where he belonged – surrounded by pints of Guinness and the familiar chatter of pub patrons. His best friend Ned had secured him a spot behind the bar, but it quickly became apparent that this was not going to be an easy gig.
As Simon donned his apron and prepared for his first shift, he found himself paralyzed with anxiety. The seemingly innocuous shape of the bar, which resembled a ship's bow, proved to be a recipe for disaster. Every time he moved in one direction, customers began calling out from the other side, making it impossible for him to remember their names or recall the drinks they had ordered.
Panic set in as Simon frantically tried to serve his first customers, but everything that could go wrong did. He poured beer into glasses meant for red wine, mixed up his beers, and even broke a glass (or two). The pub patrons' faces twisted into grotesque caricatures, as if they were witnessing some kind of horror movie.
As the chaos reached its peak, Simon's legs began to buckle beneath him. He felt like he was going to pass out from sheer exhaustion and embarrassment. His manager, sensing his distress, intervened with a merciful yet firm message: it was time for Simon to leave.
The aftermath was just as painful as the ordeal itself. Unable to face his parents or his best friend Ned, Simon retreated into a shell of shame and humiliation. But 40 years on, he's finally begun to open up about his pub-hopping nightmare to fellow bartenders, using a humorous phrase coined by one of them: "aversion therapy."
Simon's story serves as a reminder that even the most seemingly simple profession can be intimidating for those who are new to it. And while we may not all end up in pub drama like Simon did, we've all been there – if only occasionally wondering how someone else manages to pour pints with such ease behind the bar.
When 25-year-old Simon Hattenstone landed his dream job at The Friendship Inn in Prestwich, he thought he was exactly where he belonged – surrounded by pints of Guinness and the familiar chatter of pub patrons. His best friend Ned had secured him a spot behind the bar, but it quickly became apparent that this was not going to be an easy gig.
As Simon donned his apron and prepared for his first shift, he found himself paralyzed with anxiety. The seemingly innocuous shape of the bar, which resembled a ship's bow, proved to be a recipe for disaster. Every time he moved in one direction, customers began calling out from the other side, making it impossible for him to remember their names or recall the drinks they had ordered.
Panic set in as Simon frantically tried to serve his first customers, but everything that could go wrong did. He poured beer into glasses meant for red wine, mixed up his beers, and even broke a glass (or two). The pub patrons' faces twisted into grotesque caricatures, as if they were witnessing some kind of horror movie.
As the chaos reached its peak, Simon's legs began to buckle beneath him. He felt like he was going to pass out from sheer exhaustion and embarrassment. His manager, sensing his distress, intervened with a merciful yet firm message: it was time for Simon to leave.
The aftermath was just as painful as the ordeal itself. Unable to face his parents or his best friend Ned, Simon retreated into a shell of shame and humiliation. But 40 years on, he's finally begun to open up about his pub-hopping nightmare to fellow bartenders, using a humorous phrase coined by one of them: "aversion therapy."
Simon's story serves as a reminder that even the most seemingly simple profession can be intimidating for those who are new to it. And while we may not all end up in pub drama like Simon did, we've all been there – if only occasionally wondering how someone else manages to pour pints with such ease behind the bar.
his situation sounds SO relatable - have you ever had a day where everything just goes wrong and you're just trying not to make a total fool of yourself? 
bartending can't be easy, especially for a newbie. i mean, who hasn't spilled something on the job or had a customer get their order mixed up 
but at least simon's story has a happy ending... sorta 
You know what's crazy? We're all just trying to figure things out as we go along. I mean, who hasn't spilled something at work or messed up a presentation? It's like, we're all in this together, and everyone has their own aversion therapy moment (btw, love that phrase!) 
But honestly, most people just pretend to know what they're doing until someone gives them feedback (or in Simon's case, gets benched 
).
I feel so bad for that guy Simon... 25 and already having a total meltdown behind the bar 
. And poor Ned, his best friend, just trying to help him out... I'd be super embarrassed too if I were in his shoes 
. Aversion therapy? 
. Let's all just say we've been there too, right? 
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but it's actually kinda relatable, u know? like, who hasn't spilled a drink or two (or ten) in their time? 
! He just wanted to do a good job but everything went wrong 
. Poor guy must've been so stressed out 
. But you know what? We've all had those moments where we feel like total fools 
, you know? Like, your favorite pub would be this warm and welcoming spot where everyone knew each other's names... okay, maybe not always 
. Ugh, the memories are real, fam! 
. I've been to enough pubs myself where I felt like I was going to spit my drink out or something if the bartender messed up for one second.