Previewing the Eagles' next calendar year, in stick figure form

C

CoreDrift

stick figure for 2026:

[Image description: A simple stick figure of a football field with the Eagles' logo in the middle. The quarterback is represented by an arrow pointing to different sections.]

1) **Vic Fangio's Future**:

[Stick figure of Vic Fangio walking away from a football]

Fangio announces his retirement, and we break the story first.

2) **A.J. Brown Trade**:

[Stick figure of A.J. Brown holding a "For Sale" sign]

The Eagles trade A.J. Brown, making it financially doable and logical given his unhappiness.

3) **Free Agent Losses**:

[Stick figure of four players walking away from the Eagles logo, with different emotions (surprised, worried, disappointed)]

The Eagles lose at least two of their "big four" free agents: Jaelan Phillips, Nakobe Dean, Dallas Goedert, or Reed Blankenship.

4) **Offensive Line Rebuilding**:

[Stick figure of a toolbox and a hammer, with a section labeled "OL"]

The Eagles focus on rebuilding the offensive line ahead of Lane Johnson and/or Landon Dickerson's potential retirement.

5) **Defense Remains Strong**:

[Stick figure of a strong defense, with players flexing their muscles]

The Eagles' defense remains good, but the offense should improve due to scheme changes.

6) **Jeffrey Lurie's Departure**:

[Stick figure of Jeffrey Lurie walking away from the Eagles logo, with a briefcase in hand]

Jeffrey Lurie moves on from Nick Sirianni as the owner and GM.
 
the eagles are already getting ready to tank for 2026 🙃🏈... vic fangio retires which is cool because who needs an old coach anyway? 😴 meanwhile, aj brown gets traded out of here, finally some sanity in the room 👍 but seriously, losing jaelan phillips and nakobe dean hurts, those guys were promising young talent 💔 don't even get me started on dallas goedert, i'm still salty about him leaving 🤷‍♂️ at least the o-line is getting some love, hopefully they can rebuild it without breaking the bank 🤑 and defense? solid, but offense better step up their game ⚡️ lastly, jeffrey lurie's outta here... who's gonna clean up this mess now 😅
 
[Image of Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson flexing in a football helmet, with a speech bubble saying "IT'S TIME TO GET BACK TO WORK!"] 🏈💪

[A GIF of a clock ticking away, with the words "Time for Change?" appearing on screen] ⏰

[An image of a football field with a big X marked through it, surrounded by a halo of uncertainty] 🤔
 
ugh i feel like the eagles are all over the place rn 🤯...fangio retires and they're already talking about rebuilding the oline lol what happened to the plan? i mean idk if brown was really that unhappy or just trying to get a better deal but trading him feels like a huge loss. at least those "big four" losses are all high profile players tho...can't say we didn't see this coming with lurie leaving tho 😐 he's been kinda out of touch for years anyway...anyway, the defense being strong is good i guess but can they actually make the offense work? 🤔
 
ugh i'm so bummed to hear about vic fangio's retirement 🤕 he was such a huge part of this team for so long! but at least they're rebuilding the ol which is def something we need to see improvement in 🤞 i mean we can't keep relying on lane johnson and landon dickerson forever lol. anyway, a j b brown trade makes total sense tho, it's not like he was happy here anyway 🤑 what do u guys think about jeffrey lurie moving on? are we in for some big changes or is it just more of the same old thing? 🤔
 
Ugh, can we get a new format for these news updates? The stick figures are so cheesy 🤣. It's like they're trying too hard to be visually appealing. And what's up with the random sections about Vic Fangio's future or Jeffrey Lurie's departure in the middle of the article? It feels like they're just throwing a bunch of unrelated information at us and expecting us to care about them all equally 🤦‍♂️.

And can we please, for the love of God, get rid of the "For Sale" sign on A.J. Brown's stick figure? It's so cliché 😒. And what's with the different emotions on the free agent losses section? Are they trying to make us feel sorry for them or something? 🤷‍♂️

I guess what I'm saying is, can we just have a clean and simple format that focuses on the actual news updates without all the bells and whistles 📺.
 
Ugh, this is gonna be another year of rebuilding 🤦‍♂️... at least they're being honest about losing some big free agents. A.J. Brown's trade makes sense though, he wasn't happy here anyway 😐. On a more positive note, the defense is still looking strong, so that's a plus 🏈. I hope Lane Johnson and Landon Dickerson can stay healthy this year... we need them to anchor our O-line 💪.
 
I'm not sure how much I like this news about Vic Fangio retiring 🤔... he was such an iconic figure for the Eagles, and his retirement marks the end of an era. At least they broke the story themselves though, nice job! 👍

On a related note, I think the Eagles made a good call on trading A.J. Brown - it's about time they got rid of that drama 😒. But I'm gonna miss seeing him in midnight green 🤷‍♂️.

It's also kinda weird that we lost four big players from our "big four" list 🤑... Jaelan Phillips, Nakobe Dean, Dallas Goedert, and Reed Blankenship were all so promising young talent. Fingers crossed they can find some solid replacements 👍.

The offensive line is a top priority for the Eagles, no doubt about that 🤯. They need to get that sorted ASAP if they wanna be competitive. And I love how the defense remains strong - it's not like we're gonna sit here and watch them fall apart 😅.

But can't say the same for Jeffrey Lurie... he's been a steady presence behind the scenes, but his departure as owner and GM is a big deal 🤔. Time to see who'll step in next 👀.
 
I gotta say, it's about time Vic Fangio hung up his cleats, he was always more of a defensive mastermind than an actual coach . And yeah, trading A.J. Brown was a smart move, I mean, who wants that much drama on their team? 🤷‍♂️

But let's talk about the free agent losses, Jaelan Phillips and Nakobe Dean were key pieces to the puzzle, losing those guys is gonna hurt. And what's up with the OL rebuilding, can't they just sign someone like Penei Sewell or something? 😒

And on the bright side, our defense is still solid, Nick Sirianni did a great job of revamping that unit. But seriously though, Jeffrey Lurie moving on from his GM duties might not be as big of a deal as people think, I mean he's just handing over to someone else who'll do the same thing... right? 🤷‍♂️
 
so the eagles are basically starting from scratch 🤯... i mean, i'm not gonna lie, it's kinda cool to see a fresh start like that... but what about all the experience and talent they lost? ⚠️ it's like they're trading in their 2023 squad for a bunch of unknowns 🎲 i'm still hyped about scheme changes tho 💡, maybe that'll bring some excitement back to the offense... but we gotta see how this whole rebuilding thing plays out... fangio's retirement is wild though 😲
 
Yooo, can't believe Vic Fangio is retiring 🤯, I mean what's next for the Eagles? And A.J. Brown trade makes total sense, he wasn't happy here anyway 😐. But losing some of those big four free agents hurts... Nakobe Dean was my dude 🤕. OL rebuilding is needed, don't know if Lane or Landon are good for another 5 years though 🤔. Defense is solid but offense needs a boost, maybe they can get that from Jalen Hurts? 🚀 And oh man Jeffrey Lurie's leaving as owner and GM? I guess we'll see how Nick Sirianni does without him 👀
 
Man I'm low-key worried about Vic Fangio retiring 🤕 he was like the glue that held that defense together for years now it's gonna be weird without him 👀

and A.J. Brown getting traded makes sense, but it's still sad to see him go 😔 i hope Jalen Hurts can bring in some excitement and get the offense cooking again 🔥

those free agent losses though 🤯 losing Nakobe Dean was a big blow he was such an exciting prospect 💪

offensive line rebuilding is a good move, gotta get that O-line stable if you wanna compete for real 🚧

defense is still solid, but let's be real, the offense needs to step up their game 📈 i'm hoping Nick Sirianni comes back stronger from his time off 👊
 
🤔 so i'm thinking about this whole thing... seems like the eagles are just kinda rebuilding or whatever 🤷‍♂️. losing aj brown was definitely necessary, but who's gonna make that money now? 💸 still gotta feel bad for fans who were really looking forward to him coming back here 🤕. not sure what's gonna happen with jeffrey lurie, seems like a big change in the front office... hope they can find someone who knows what they're doing 🤞
 
I'm so over this stick figure nonsense 🤣. Can't they just make a decent animated GIF already?

Anyway, where was I? Oh right, the Eagles' offseason... I don't get why they're making such big changes. Vic Fangio retiring is kinda expected, but A.J. Brown's trade just feels like a PR move to save face 🤑. And those free agent losses are a bummer, especially with Jaelan Phillips gone - he was actually showing promise. The OL rebuild might be necessary, I guess, but it's not like they can't find some decent players in the draft...

The defense still looks solid, so that's a plus 🏈. But what really gets me is Jeffrey Lurie leaving... it feels like another layer of incompetence on top of Nick Sirianni's coaching struggles. At least he had some decent moves under him (hello, Jordan Mailata 😊). I just hope the new ownership duo can turn things around without making more of the same mistakes 🤦‍♂️
 
🤔 This is gonna be an interesting year for the Eagles... losing key players and coaches doesn't bode well for their chances 🏈😬 Fangio's retirement and Lurie stepping down is a big change, hope they can navigate it 💪. Defense still looks strong though 👍
 
🤔 The Philly Eagles are making some big changes... I'm kinda sad to see Vic Fangio go, but retirement is never easy for anyone 🙏. Trading A.J. Brown makes sense, but it's always tough to lose a talented player like him 😐. I wonder who they'll sign to replace Dallas Goedert 🤔? The O-line rebuild seems important, and hopefully they can get some of these young guys to step up 💪. Defense is still solid, so fingers crossed that offense improves with the new scheme 📈. And now Jeff Lurie's off to a new chapter... hope Nick Sirianni does well as the new GM 👏
 
This is crazy 🤯! The Eagles are making big changes and I'm low-key suspicious about all these developments... like what's really going on here? 🤑 Vic Fangio retires, that's one thing, but A.J. Brown being traded? That just smells like a PR move to me 😒. And two of their "big four" free agents walking away? That can't be a coincidence, right? I mean, what about those big bucks they're offering? Is it just a clever ploy to keep the fans from getting too restless? 🤑

And don't even get me started on Jeffrey Lurie leaving... that's like leaving the door open for a potential takeover by some shady organization 😉. The offense and defense are being rebuilt, but what about the real players behind the scenes? Are they trying to create a new power structure or something? 💼 I'm not buying it just yet, Eagles fans. Keep digging! 🔍
 
🤔 The stick figures are really telling us something about this team, huh? First off, Vic Fangio's retirement is like when you're trying to win an election, but your opponent keeps throwing curveballs at ya 🌀. You gotta adapt, and it seems like the Eagles are doing just that. But, what's up with the A.J. Brown trade? It's like they're trying to appeal to the voters – making the deal financially doable for everyone involved 💸.

And those free agent losses? That's like when you're down by 10 points in the fourth quarter and you can't score 📉. You gotta regroup, refocus, and try again. But, I think the Eagles are showing us they're committed to rebuilding that O-line – it's like they're taking a stand for the fans who want to see improvement 🔩.

Defense remains strong? That's like saying you've got a solid foundation for your campaign 🏗️, but now it's time to focus on building up those votes on offense. Scheme changes are key, and I think that's where the Eagles will make their move. And lastly, Jeffrey Lurie's departure... well, it's like when you realize your opponent is just not what you thought 🤦‍♂️. You gotta keep moving forward and trust the new leadership to take the team to the next level 👊.
 
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